I once sculpted a dog out of cheese,
and far from making me pleased
I was ill at ease with his cheesy fleas.

(little dog poem for you there)

It was quite out of character
for our beagle
to be evil
to beleaguered seagulls,
apart from anything else
he was aware it was illegal.

(another one)

When I first met her,
our red setter (called Greta)
was much better.
Lately, since the veterinary letter,
she’s more bed wetter than go getter.

(and another)

The bull fighting dog
was no match for Doreen’s car.
A matador labrador he may be,
but a Seat Ibiza is another matter,
Dor.

(This one doesn’t rhyme) (Intentionally)

Our retriever is hard of hearing
so is fitted with a receiver.
Now there’s no sound he can’t pick up
and no freeview channel either.

(go on, stop me)

If I had a spaniel
I wouldn’t name him Daniel –
‘cos Daniel is my brother’s name
and he’d fly off the handle.

(this is true)

If ever there was a dog who liked digging
it was the terrier.
He’d dig, and dig,
and dig and dig and dig.
And then he’d bury’ya.

(little scamp)